Things I've Learned From Boys

If you have ever raised a boy or have a young boy you know that these stories from anonymous Mothers are not only possible, likely and true, it is highly possible that much worse could happen.


You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on. When using the ceiling fan as a bat ypu have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.
The glass in windows (even double - pane) doesn't stop a ceiling fan.

When you hear the toilet flush and the words "uh oh" it's already too late.

Play dough and microwave should not be used in the same sentence. ( I cannot urge this strongly enough)

Always look in the oven before you turn it on, trust me on this plastic toys and hot ovens do not mix.

VCR's do not eject "PB and J" sandwiches

A six year old boy can start a fire with a flint rock

You can not walk on water no matter how much Jell-o you put in the pool.
Pool filters do not like Jello-o

Certain lego's will pass through the digestive track of a five year old boy.

If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 45 pound boy wearing Batman underwear and a Superman cape.
It is however strong enough if tied to a paint can to spread paint on all four walls of a 20 x 20 ft. room.

hatshepsut

That brought back some pretty bad memories with mine too! .............. "When you hear the toilet flush and the words "uh oh" it's already too late."

I have several very unhappy memories with the toilet flushing and uh oh myself.

hatshepsut

What - that just happened yesterday, and it was me who did it!
I also dropped allot of make-up applicators down the sink drain, a blush brush down the toilet!! LOL!!!

I'm happy to say my son ( 14yrs old ) has never done any of those things. Happily, the safe plastic bubble I've kept him in all these years has not popped yet!! LOL!! ( Can you tell I only have 1 child?! )

Yea...but he's a beaut, ML!

Hat...those were hilarious!

LOL!!! You HAVE to say that, you're his Aunt!!

Mystery Lover, last night at a little after 5 o'clock with the sewer trap hiding under 5 inches of snow I was not a happy camper when I heard Mom there's a problem in the bathroom. My son was innocent of the problem this time.
After eight years of experiments gone really wrong I have a long list of things that do not work and should never be attempted.
Needless to say I rarely have a dull moment.

jkeerie some of my son's badly gone wrong experiments have become legendary at family gatherings and a big source of entertainment.

hatshepsut

Oh, you MUST share these!! I Love these kinds of stories!!!

Mystery Lover ok I will think of some more of his less than sucessful experiments for you. While I'm thinking this comes to mind. I water gun filled with window cleaner is not going to become the new window washer for the inside part of the storm door.

hatshepsut

LOL!! You must be blessed with unlimited Patience!!!

yes patience is something I have become very well aquainted with. I also try to keep in mind that Einstein and Newton were also problematic children.

On the hottest day of the year a dozen eggs on the sidewalk makes an incredible mess.

And you can not train red ants to be army ants by leaving a trail of jelly sandwich from an anthill to your room. You will however have a houseful of red ants.

hatshepsut

LOL!!!!!! To Funny!!!!!!

My brother is the only boy of 5 children. My mother always said she was glad she only had one, especially after she heard gurgling in his room one day and found a home-made still.

Lady Kestrel that is funny. Thankfully my son has never thought of that experiment.

hatshepsut

Now these have so cheered me up - there are many I could tell about myself so must try and remember them. I'm the one who usually gets things 'lavatory'!!!

siobhan yes please try to remember them and share with us.

hatshepsut

Hatshepsut, you kids maybe great scientists or inventors someday!! Then it will all have been worth it!!

Siobhan, let's hear some!!